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Simutaneous Contact Shit
Where the log is in simultaneous contact with both your ass and the water. This impressiveness of this feat obviously depends on the ass/water distance. I have achieved this here in the UK where the distance is about 12 inches.
sushi shit
I shit thirty feet through a screen door for three days
Barber Shit
The type of shit that rips out your ass-fro when it comes out.
Bin Laden shit
The kind of shit that plugs up the toilet so bad you need a plunger, but the plunger can’t draw it out ’cause it’s gone into hiding somewhere in the pipes
Black log
Hard and big the kind that strechs yer ass
Picasso Shit
The type of shit so fascinating to your child that they use it to try and replicate Picasso’s Unknown Masterpiece on your walls.
The PERFECT Shit
So round..so firm..so fully packed!!!!
machinegun shitting
Diarrhea soo bad that when u shit it goes(blaat blaat blaat) and you wish you had handles on the side of the bowl.
Machine Gun Shit
The kind of when you fart and shit at the same time! It comes out sounding like BBBWWWAAAATTT!BBBWWWAAATTT!BBBWWWAAATTT! Better have a whole roll of paper after this one!
SLOW FAST SHIT
The kind where your having some fun and its coming out slowly then it flys out like water in sink pipe.
Tug-of-War Shit
When your pushing so hard to get the shit out and it feels like it’s grabbing onto something in there, and finally when it comes out it’s just a little turd.
Never Ending Story shit
The kind when u hold your shit for a long time and when u finally sit on the toilet ur shirt comes out and feels like it’s never going to end. And you are afraid to cut it off cause u want to see how big u can get it. And when it is finally out You get up to look at your work but it’s already down the hole and u realized it wasn’t worth cause ur butthole hurts for like an hour.
Oatmeal shit
Occurs after you are sick, and your shit hasn’t quite made it back to turd form due to diarehha. It just falls right out of your ass and looks like a pile of brown outmeal in the bottom of your toilet.
Gotta Have A Witness Shit
It’s so big you have to show somebody, just because you know nobody will ever believe you.
The Shower Special
This is the most meanest shit ever. It is a combo, it involves taking two shits. The first involves strained pushing that results in a regular shit, and you wipe, and put your pants back on. When you look at your undies later, you see shit all over for some reason. After throwing those undies in the trash, you go to the shitter and try to shit, and a regular shit comes out but you have to wipe and wipe and wipe. At the end you say fuck it and take a shower and spray the stream of water directly at your sphincter and get all the shit residue off.
Embarrassing Shit
You’re not gonna make it home you gotta shit so bad, the bell rings for recess and you bolt for the bathroom. By the time you sit down and drop your load, a dozen heads pop over and under the stall you turn red as laughter erupts and insults are exchanged.
Smellopathic Shit
Oh…shit!! you walked right into a horrendous cloud of shit after someone let one rip, reeling you hurry on your way. later while dropping the kids off at the pool your nose is assaulted with the same foul smelling stench you ran into earlier.. it’s weird, like the poo knew?!
Black-Out Shit
I held my shit in so long that day that when I started drinking I forgot all about the shit, anyway I Blacked Out(my body switched to auto-pilot) sometime that night. The next morning I came back to my senses on the porcelain throne, finally, I had made it to the toilet, then I realized that I was sitting in a big shitty mess, in my drunken stupor I had forgotten to lift the lid. It wasn’t pretty, shit was everywhere, the highlight of my morning consisted of showering my shitty ass, washing my shitty clothes(several cycles), and scraping a cm. of caked shit off the toiler lid… At least I made it to the Shitter.
After being butt fucked shit.
When being pounded in the poop shoot for a good half hour and then it wants release.
Squeezy Shit
The kind of shit that digested a little too quickly and slowly extrudes out of your ass, totally covering your anus with a thick layer of poop, which is very hard to wipe off.
Needle Poop
Your colon is in such a spasm that all the shit you expell is as skinny as a needle and very, very long.
Radio Alarm Clock Shit
The type of shit you wake up to in the morning.
White Dog Poo.
How come you don’t see that anymore?
Champagne Shit
When you’re taking a shit and you hafta push real hard, and when you finally get it out it’s like popping the cork out of a champagne bottle, spewing liquidy shit all over.
the BIGFOOT shit
This is the types of shit where it is so large that it leaves an actual imprint on the porcelian of the toilet. When you go to look at it has vanished!
